9 Conversion Killing Content Mistakes You’re Probably Making (and How to Fix Them)

9 Conversion Killing Content Mistakes You’re Probably Making (and How to Fix Them)

When you start to think you’re getting good at content creation, try sharing your writing with the Reddit community called “Roast My Startup.”

They won’t just roast your work – they’ll slice it, dice it, and burn it to a crisp.

That’s the whole point. They’ll give you brutally honest feedback.

The piece of content I threw into the meat grinder was my first post on the Happy Box Blog. I was feeling pretty proud of this 3,000-word epic post I’d crafted – but one of my personal heroes, Oli Gardner from Unbounce, was nice enough to stop by and tear it to shreds.

In fact, Oli pointed out 9 highly specific problems I needed to fix in my content. I’ve already learned a ton from them. I’ve expanded them; fleshed them out. And now I’m passing them on to you.

Here are the 9 problems, and how to fix ‘em.

Problem 1: Long-winded intros that don’t add value
Problem 2: Hard-to-navigate layout and structure
Problem 3: Writing that conveys no authority or adds no value
Problem 4: Headlines and subheads that don’t help the reader
Problem 5: “Edgy” statements that are actually just whiny or insulting
Problem 6: Tweetables that aren’t worth tweeting
Problem 7: Explanations that don’t provide concrete solutions
Problem 8: Posts that aren’t based on definite outlines
Problem 9: Half-assed calls to action

Problem 1: Long-winded intros that don’t add value

If you’re reading this sentence, that means my intro section worked. See, we’ve both learned something already.

A reader who makes it through the intro will at least skim the rest of your post. Some might even feel engaged enough to hit that “Share” button. But a reader who gets bored in the intro, on the other hand, just winks out of existence (as far as you’re concerned) and never returns. You’ve lost ‘em for good.

The intro is the only place where you’ve got 100% of your audience’s attention.

The latest research by Chartbeat proves my point. Take a look at this graph. 10% of people never even scroll down the page at all. A full 80% just glance at the photos and videos, but don’t read what you’ve written.

A pretty picture grabs eyeballs. A great intro grabs minds. Click To Tweet

Chart indicating percent of article viewed

Percentage of Article Content Viewed


Follow these three tips to write intros that hook readers’ attention, right from the start:

a. Build a connection, then empathize about it

Show your audience that you go through the same crap they do. Tell a quick anecdote. Raise a big question. Name a frustration that everyone’s wrestling with, but nobody’s been able to pinpoint. Stir their curiosity about the answer.

When the reader thinks, “Yeah, that’s exactly what I’m dealing with!” that’s when you’ve got ‘em hooked.

b. Say what this post is going to fix

People want to know how you’re going to help them. If they’re going to invest time in your post, they want a payoff in return.

Nobody wants to read 500 words of rambling explanation before the meat of the post. Readers can pick up on fluff surprisingly quickly, and they’ll either skim it, skip it, or just leave your page. Don’t bother writing it.

As my man Neil Patel says in his post on HubSpot:

It may be obvious to you why the content of your article is important to your readers, but it may not be obvious to them. Let them know loud and clear why it’s important for them to know the information you cover in your article.

Tell them what they’ll get out of this. And make it snappy.

c. Keep it under 150 words

The intro to this article is pushing 150 words, and even that’s enough to test the reader’s patience. If anything in your intro takes more than a short paragraph to explain, move it somewhere else in the article – or just delete it.

Problem 2: Hard-to-navigate layout and structure

Ever get into a gigantic, detailed post about a topic you love? You know, one of those posts that makes you go, “There is no way I’m reading this whole thing today. But I know I’m gonna be re-reading it for months.”

That’s the kind of reaction I’m always shooting for when I write posts like 3290 Word Guide to Optimizing Conversions Throughout Your Sales Funnel.

I’m aiming for readers to bookmark the post and come back to it week after week – year after year, if I did my job – and pick up new tips for different stages of the process.

That’s why it’s crucial to make your article as accessible and navigable as the reference text it is. Insert some anchor links to make it easy to jump between sections.

When your article is accessible, readers will spend more time on your page. If you’ve made it accessible and concretely helpful, they and their friends will keep spending time on your page for a long time to come.

Problem 3: Writing that conveys no authority or adds no value

Confident writers get to the point.

They express each thought clearly.

They only use as many words as are necessary.

Then they shut up, because they know they’ve made a solid argument.

Follow these five tips to write with authority:

a. Kill off filler words

Which pair of sentences grabs your attention more?

The quality of your content is determined by how valuable it is in addressing the needs of your audience. So don’t write a single word without considering how it benefits your readers.


Valuable content addresses the needs of its audience. Don’t write a word unless it benefits your readers.

Simplicity is Part 1 of the fixes here. Many people don’t catch Part 2.

Believe it or not, the second thing that shouldn’t be there is the word “so.”

“So” is a filler word. One study found that it’s the single word most likely to torpedo a TED speaker’s credibility – and the same is true for blogging. “So” indicates a lack of confidence, so it shouldn’t be in your writing. (See what I did there?)

As Oli says,

By removing the word “so” from your sentence you create a powerful position statement as opposed to an apologetic teenage shrug.

The word “so” just one example of phrasing that weakens your position – but the point is that readers respond to confidence. They respond to authority. Filler words undermine that authority. Get rid of ‘em.

b. Don’t bother with data unless it’s actually meaningful

Anybody can Google up some semi-relevant stats and slap them together. That’s not thought leadership; it’s cutting-and-pasting.

What if, this far down in the article, I started saying things like, “Using data will make your content 40% more popular,” and started dancing around (metaphorically speaking) like I’d just dropped an epic knowledge bomb on you?

Dilbert comic about numbers in content


A statistic like that might be factually true – but it doesn’t tell you anything concrete. It’s not actionable. It’s not even specific.

You’d be perfectly justified in asking:

  • 40% more popular as opposed to what?
  • In what context?
  • What are your sources?
  • How drunk were you when you wrote this?

…and many other pointed questions.

When you cite statistics in your writing, cite them in relevant, useful, actionable ways. Here’s a great article by the Writing Center at the University of North Carolina – and another article by Buffer – on how to make that happen.

c. Talk transparently about your sources

If you’re proud of your source, don’t be coy about it. And if you’re not proud about your source, then find another source.

Verify the reputation of each source you cite, as far as you’re able. A quick Google search is usually enough to give you a basic “yes” or a “hell no.”

d. Deliver on your promise to add value

Remember in the section on writing intros, when I said you need to promise to fix something in your post? Yeah, readers actually want you to deliver on that.

You might be writing blog posts to draw attention to your products – but that’s not a reason for anyone to read them. They’re investing their time with you because they want to solve a problem, or gain an insight, or just be blown clean out of their socks by the sheer force of your genius.

One way or another, it’s your job to make the ride worth the time.

e. Spellcheck that shit

There’s no easier way to lose credibility than to have “spellng mistaks” in your text.

I mean, do I really have to say this in 2015? When any piece of software you could possibly be writing in has its own built-in spell checker?

There’s just no valid excuse for this.

Problem 4: Headlines and subheads that don’t help the reader

“I’m so pumped to read this irrelevant wall of text written by a stranger!”

– literally no one ever

A captivating headline tells people your content is relevant; that it’s worth the read. It makes people click your link. It makes at least some of them start reading. And if you’ve written a solid intro, that may just be enough to draw them into your world.

Subheads serve some different, but equally important purposes. They help break up your text – colourfully if you’ve got a good blog design (and you should). They draw attention to important points. They help readers find the sections they want.

In short, an engaging headline gives people a reason to read your article – and an engaging subhead gives them a reason to read each section.

Follow these four tips to write headlines and subheads that leap off the page:

a. Keep your heads and subheads clear and specific

Here’s one of my articles’ subheads that Oli tore apart: “Step 1: Top of the Funnel.”

How many problems can you see with it?

Well, first off, “Top of the Funnel” isn’t even a step. It’s not something to do; it’s just a phrase. Beyond that, this subhead doesn’t tell readers what’s coming in the section below. It’s not specific, so it serves no place as a placeholder.

Nowadays, I’d write it more like this: “Step 1: Reduce unqualified leads at the top of your sales funnel.”

Sure, it’s longer. But it contains a clear idea about what the section’s going to focus on. It helps readers decide to keep reading. Those are the goals of a clear and specific subhead.

b. Pose questions that demand answers

In my post on how to increase conversion rates during your Buyer’s Journey, I talked about crafting headlines that raise questions.

What are the essential elements in Pixar’s storytelling? What homepage clutter am I failing to eliminate? What were the management secrets of the Aztecs?

Give people are reason to want to learn more.

Start with a basic headline – for example, something like, “Are You Tired of Chasing After Hard-to-Reach Customers?” – and make it stronger: “How to Tell Hard-to-Reach Customers From Non-Customers.”

Present a common problem. Hint that you’ve got the solution. Do those things well, and curiosity will do the rest.

c. Write lots of headlines and cross-test ‘em

Two headlines enter! One headline leaves!

Better yet, start with five headlines. Or ten. Makes the battle more interesting.

Nobody nails a headline on the first try. The good news is, tools like Optimizely and VWO are great for pitting two or more headlines head-to-head and seeing which comes out on top.

As this post on CrazyEgg says, “Every headline is clickbait.” Writers for BuzzFeed and UpWorthy write 10 or more headlines for every article, then A/B test them until a victor emerges. Do the same, and your headline has a fighting chance in the social-media arena.

d. Read your subheads in isolation

If they don’t make perfect sense on their own, without the rest of the article to explain them, they’re not clear enough. Your subheads should tell a story – a simplified story, obviously; but a focused, coherent story nonetheless.

Each subhead should point logically to the one that follows it. Each of them should present its own little self-contained thought, like a short tweet.

If you get stuck, try switching up the order of your subheads, and see if another sequence makes more sense.

Problem 5: “Edgy” statements that are actually just whiny or insulting

There’s a fine line between speaking the truth that others have been afraid to say out loud… and just plain being whiny.

Controversy is fine. Jokes are fine. Even a little raunchiness can be fine.

Whining and insulting your own readers – that’s not fine.

Woman hugging child with text “stop being so edgy, you’re scaring the children”

Hold me please.

Insult the problem, not the reader. You want the reader on your side - so always take their side. Click To Tweet
It’s not always obvious when you’re on the wrong side of this line – as I found out first-hand from Oli – so let me break down what I mean here.

Saying something controversial can be a sign of confidence – provided you say something that needs to be said instead of just begging for attention. If it really needs to be said, then say it. Say it at the right time, in the right way, and it might just turn you into a thought leader.

Saying something insulting or whiny, on the other hand, conveys the exact opposite impression. It makes you sound insecure; like you’re not in control. Or, worse yet, like you actually resent your sector or some of your customers.

In the article Oli roasted, I referred to the majority of people at the top of a sales funnel as “time-wasters.” I thought I was being frank; funny – refreshingly honest, even.

Not really, Oli told me:

“Don’t insult people. Statements like “time-wasters” might seem like a funny thing to say, but it also applies to most of the people reading your post.”

The last phrase is the key there. I was inadvertently insulting my own reader base. Instead of calling these people “time-wasters,” I should’ve used neutral phrases like “the wrong targets” or “non-ideal customers.”

“But wait!” I hear you saying. “People love drama! They love to complain!”

Yeah, they love to complain about their own lives – but they sure as hell don’t want to hear you complain about them. When readers come to your blog, they want solutions. They want uplifting, inspirational, problem-solving content that’s worth sharing because it feels good to read.

If you’re not sure how to walk this fine line – or where your own writing should fall on the controversy spectrum – that’s OK. It just means you’re still developing your voice and testing your brand’s boundaries. The voice you adopt will depend on your audience, and on your own personality and comfort zone. Check out this great guide by Jeff Goins on how to figure that stuff out.

Problem 6: Tweetables that aren’t worth tweeting

Embedding tweetable quotes in your article can be a powerful way of keeping the conversation going, far beyond the final line. When done right, tweets are addictive little info packets that automatically keep promoting your content and ideas.

But your tweetables will only create value if they’re well-written, and if they convey meaning in a clever, memorable, and creative way.

Because – as Oli pointed out when he roasted my article – the goal isn’t just to get people to tweet your quote. It’s to get their followers to retweet it, too.

It’s simple to create and embed tweetables with a variety of WordPress plugins. You don’t even need a Twitter account. Here’s what I use myself.

Follow these three tips to craft tweetables that beg to be shared.

a. Create tweetables that thrive on their own

Context shouldn’t matter. Tweetables need to stand alone, without the rest of your article to prop them up.

Sounds obvious, doesn’t it? And yet I somehow totally missed this with some of my tweetables. It doesn’t matter how suave a quote sounds at the end of a paragraph – it needs to be an unbreakable diamond of wisdom all on its own.

Here’s one of my weak tweetables, which Oli rightly tore apart:

“The goal isn’t to get everyone to buy but to figure out who is genuinely interested and able to pay.”

This is a true and meaningful statement – in the context of the article. Removed from that context, it’s useless. It’s not even exactly clear what it’s talking about.

Make sure your tweetables can survive in the wild.

b. Phrase your thought in an unexpected way

Every thought that can possibly be conceived by a human mind has already been expressed in some shape or form. If that wasn’t true 20 years ago, it’s definitely true now, in the age of 400 million tweets per day.

All that’s left is to say something in a way it’s never been said before. Which is definitely possible if you know what you’re doing.

As John Corcoran says in this excellent article on tweetables:

“A good tweetable quote … captures the essence of a speaker’s speech, talk, presentation, or other messages.”

In other words, a tweetable needs a “Wow” factor – or at the very least, an “A-ha!” factor. People will retweet it if it says something that genuinely needs to be said – or that they wish they’d said themselves.

Controversial quotes can be great tools for this – but as I said in Section 5, there’s a difference between being controversial and being insulting. Stay on the cool side of that line.

c. Hint at a brilliant article behind the quote

Like a smart headline or subhead, a well-written tweetable generates curiosity about the article and blog it came from.

Although your tweetables need to fly freely beyond their original context, they should still make readers think, “Wow. I want to know what else this writer has to say about that,” like this tweet:

Sentences don’t have to say much – just the right things. Our imaginations will fill in the blanks. http://bit.ly/LyV8hS via @copyblogger

Or else, “Whoa. I want to know why this writer said that,” like this tweet:

Want to improve your diet & energy? Stop eating grains! They’re utterly pointless in a healthy diet. http://bit.ly/1hPlL0l via @Mark_Sisson

Either way, your tweetables are pointing back to the core of your own thought leadership.

Problem 7: Explanations that don’t provide concrete solutions

Everyone already knows actionable tips are crucial, right? Like, why am I even bothering to point this out?

Because there’s a difference between “actionable” and merely “explanatory.” It’s a difference that many of us miss.

An explanation is not a solution. Solutions are actionable. Offer solutions, not explanations Click To Tweet

When I submitted my article to get roasted, I felt I’d written a piece that was actionable and valuable to readers. Those were my top priorities, after all.

Then Oli sent me his feedback:

Tell me EXACTLY how to do it. It’s not a step or a process if you don’t teach me how to do it. There’s nothing I hate more in content that someone telling me how to do NOTHING.

My “actionable” tips were mostly a dull mix of general suggestions and complex descriptions.


Strip all that away, and there wasn’t much original thought left to take action on.

Actionable content provides value to readers. It builds on the reader’s interest to teach them how to do something in a way they’ve never considered before.

Here’s how to make your content actionable:

a. Understand your audience’s pain points

Imagine your post through the eyes of your ideal reader.

Now, what keeps this person up at night? Does your post discuss it?

If you don’t know who your target audience is, or what their specific pain points are, then you need to go find out – or else write a different article.

Our Ultimate Guide to Building Customer Centric Marketing Plans That Sell will show you exactly how to find your audience’s pain points, and how to address them.

b. Address their pain and offer a solution

When you complain to someone – a close friend or a stranger – one of the most affirming things they can say is simply, “Yeah, I get it. That completely sucks.”

If they say it in a way that makes you believe them, then you’re suddenly on the same side.

The exact same principle holds true for writing. Point out the exact pain points that bother your target audience. Acknowledge that you get it; you’ve felt the pain, too. You know it needs to change.

Then lay out your solution, and explain how it’ll address the problem.

c. Provide resources for achieving that solution

If you’re telling your audience what to do, you’d sure as hell better tell them how to do it. Otherwise what’s the point?

As Oli said when he roasted me, “It’s throwaway content if you’re not teaching someone how to do something.” So:

– Link to a post where you wrote how to do it

– Link to a post where someone else wrote how to do it

– Include steps within the article itself

Or delete the post and write something else.

d. Communicate. Like. A. Human. Being.

Not a robot.

We’ve all seen articles packed with jargon. It can be hard to tell if there’s a kernel of meaning buried in there at all. Maybe not.

Jargon and cliches provide no value. So focus on clarity. Keep it down-to-earth.

Here’s a great video by Google’s Matthew Cutts on exactly how to do this.

e. Write for skimming, not for reading

You could write the most brilliant headline, subheads, and intro in human history – but the fact is, most people aren’t going to read your article. They’re going to skim it.

That’s not necessarily a bad thing, though. By breaking up your text, using bulleted lists, and providing subheads that are easy to return to, you can capture the attention of readers who don’t have time to read the whole piece – but who may come back to it later, and read in more detail; or even use it as reference material.

Here’s a short, to-the-point article on crafting skimmable posts.

Problem 8: Posts that aren’t based on definite outlines

We’ve all written posts that sprawl to insane length, veer off into irrelevant territory, or just plain fizzle out for lack of focus.

Outlining keeps you focused. It also prevents you from wasting time and energy on stuff you’re going to edit out anyway.

Before you even type up the actual outline, spend a few minutes pulling these things together for yourself:

  • Your topic idea (max. 3 sentences)
  • Your target audience
  • The problem you’ll address and solve
  • Why anyone should care about this problem
  • The solution you’ll provide
  • Relevant stories and anecdotes
  • Links to research articles and images
  • Embed codes of tweets, Facebook posts or videos you want to reference
  • Possible headlines

Now you’re ready to write your outline!

List all the major points you need to hit – those will be your sections, and now’s a good time to write rough subheads for each of them. You can always come back and swap in snazzier ones as you write the article itself.

Make sure each of those sections is essential to the argument you’re making. Make sure each one addresses a pain point of your target audience, and comes packed with a concrete benefit. If not, then cut it.

Once you’ve got your resources in one place, and your whole outline on the screen, you’ll be stunned at how quickly the full post takes shape.

Problem 9: Half-assed calls to action

The reader has invested time and mental focus in processing your content. Now it’s time for you to make them an offer – hopefully one they can’t refuse.

Your call to action will differ depending on your business sector, your audience, and which stage of your Buyer’s Journey you’re targeting with your content.

Say, for instance, that your company manufactures custom printing equipment for other printing businesses – and you’re trying to gain interest and demonstrate your authority to readers in the first stage of the Buyer’s Journey.

In that case, you might publish a piece that tells people “ten things to know when buying printing equipment.” The call to action might be a link that offers you expertly researched “Top 10 Questions to Ask Before Purchasing Printing Equipment.”

When the customer clicks the link, they’ll find themselves on a landing page that tells them what they’ll find in the checklist, and explains how it’ll save them time and money.

And of course, they’ll need to fill out a contact form to get the free checklist. Customers who submit that form have taken another step in their buying journey.

Calls to action don’t always have to be another piece of content or a form submission.

In fact, here’s my call to action for you in this section:

Whoever your audience is, include a distinct call to action in every piece of content you put out. Every single one.

Critiques build strength. If you love your content, get it criticized. Then write it better. Click To Tweet

And I’ve got a much more immediate call to action for you, too – the one this whole article is about: Write the most useful, valuable content you possibly can – then get it roasted.


We’ve started offering ROASTINGS for business who want feedback on their website landing pages for ONLY $7. 

Here are just some of the issues we’ll attack: 

1.Does your page have a clear purpose and lead customers to take action?

2.Does your copy come across as confident, weak, or just plain unclear?

3.Does your layout line up with the latest research on how customers skim?

4.Does your campaign soar above the boring crap that people read every day?

With the answers to those questions in hand, you’ll be well-equipped to put your priorities in order.

Get Roasted Happy Box Solutions


  1. Very interesting article. As a professional writer, I find many of the tidbits remind me of what I learned in school (and more than once have forgotten, so thanks for the reminder!). And kudos for taking and applying the criticism. I know how hard that is, especially with one of your babies. Inspiring.

    One critique I have for your site and that’s the floating social media bar on the left hand side of the window. I’m sure the stats all show those work like gamgbusters but I read a lot on my iPad. And there’s just not enough room between the floating bar and the text. It covers up the first few letters of each line. Only about 1.5 in above and below are fully readable. If you can, add a media query for iPad width screens that adds extra left padding to your content area to give enough space for the social media bar to float there but not obscure the content (which is, after all, why I’m here!).

    And I’ll be applying for your critique in a few days. Just a bit of site clean up of my own to do first.

    • Thanks for the comment Rich. Did you type all that up on your iPad?! We’ll make sure to fix the UI on mobile.

      Tell me, as a professional writer – where do you get feedback on your writing? Are there any tools/techniques/tidbits that you use to sharpen your craft?

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